Filed Under: Emotional Eating
9 May 2025 | Written by Dominic
Mother’s Day stirs up so many emotions: gratitude, longing, warmth, grief, joy, ache. For some, it can be a day of celebration. For others, it’s complicated. It may bring up memories of love and nurturing or it may bring up memories of neglect and highlight what was missing.
Whatever this day means to you, I want to gently invite a different kind of reflection:
What has mothered you throughout your life?
For many of us with eating challenges, food has stepped in where tenderness was scarce. Where sweetness was lacking, sugar was plentiful.
Food has been there in the quiet moments, when you cried alone in your room, when you held it together all day and finally collapsed into stillness in the company of chocolate, when you felt unseen, unheard, or too much. Food soothed you when comfort wasn’t available, softened the edges that felt too sharp and created a sense of connection in a world that often felt distant.
In a very real way, food has offered a kind of mothering.
It held you when no one else did. It provided a much needed break.
It listened when no one asked how you were.
It filled the space where emotional safety should have lived.
This isn’t about blame or shame. This is about honouring the truth of how we’ve coped. Especially on a day like Mother’s Day, when themes of nurturing, safety, and belonging are so present, it’s natural for our relationship with food to feel stirred up.
You might find yourself reaching for comfort foods without even realising why. You might overeat, not out of lack of willpower, but out of a deep inner hunger for nurturing.
If food has ever felt like the one place where you could let go, breathe, or feel a moment of relief, you are not alone. There is nothing wrong with you.
There’s also another layer of healing available. One that doesn’t require giving up food as comfort.
It begins with acknowledging your needs with compassion.
Noticing the voice that says, “I should be over this by now,” and gently responding, “What if I’m allowed to still need care?”
Healing your relationship with food isn’t about control. It’s about care.
It’s about learning to meet your unmet emotional needs with permission and tenderness. On this Mother’s Day, as you reflect on the mothers in your life, or the absence of them, consider this:
What kind of mothering do you need right now at this stage of your life?
What would it be like to offer yourself that care and love?
What is one small step you can take today to offer yourself some care?
And if food is still part of how you receive comfort, let it be okay. Let it be honoured.
Learning to mother ourselves is a journey that requires courage and vulnerability. So, as we celebrate Mother’s Day and the Mother figures in our lives, let us also celebrate ourselves and commit to nurturing ourselves with love and kindness.
Wishing you well,
Xen
I’m really excited to share with you two upcoming events. Whether you’re new to mindful eating and wanting to eat more consciously or looking for extra support around emotional eating, I’ve got something coming up for you.
A Taste of Mindful Eating
Saturday 31 May on Zoom
This gentle, beginner-friendly workshop is a chance to slow down, reconnect with your body’s cues, and explore mindful eating in a safe, supportive space. We’ll practice simple tools you can start using right away to eat more consciously. No rules, no guilt, just awareness, curiosity and kindness.
10 am – 1 pm Eastern
9 am – 11 am Central
4 pm – 7 pm CET / South African Time
7 am – 10 am Pacific
3 pm – 5 pm UK time
How To Handle Emotional Eating
Sunday 6 July on Zoom
If you’ve ever turned to food when emotions feel overwhelming (you’re not alone), this workshop will offer insight, relief, and practical ways to support yourself through those tough moments when you turn to food to cope with feelings. No judgment, no shame just awareness, curiosity and kindness.
10 am – 1 pm Eastern
9 am – 11 am Central
4 pm – 7 pm CET / South African Time
7 am – 10 am Pacific
3 pm – 5 pm UK time
Not sure which one is a good fit for you? Want to have a 30-minute Discovery Call? Book here.
Hello, I'm Xen. Welcome!
I help women all over the world drop the struggle with food and their bodies to create a life of peace and freedom.
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“From our first meeting - two faces on Zoom across the world from each other, there was a sense of familiarity and comfort that was a healing balm for a lifetime of food struggles and dieting. Without realizing how much damage I had done to myself by adhering, for decades, to restrictive food plans and rigid diet programs, Xen had a way of redirecting the harsh and negative self-talk and sending me forth each week with compassion, mindfulness and a new way of seeing myself in the here and now. Gone are the maybe somedays, and if-only, and when-I’m-smaller thinking. Now I am committed to the imperfect and rocky path to listening to my body, accepting my perfect imperfections, and rejecting diet mentality. Those negative voices will revisit me from time to time, I know, but Xen has offered valuable tools for meeting each day as a fresh start - another choice, another chance. Her devotion to this work and her belief in her clients is a remarkable gift; I am so fortunate to have found her. It is never too late to let go of the drama and embrace joy, ease and self-acceptance.”
“I felt hopeless and helpless in my daily struggle with mindless eating for many years. Then I found Xen which is exactly what I needed! My decision to work with her helped me to finally repair my relationship with food. It's changing my life for the better, one day at a time. Now I have control over the food, instead of it having control over me, which is the way it should be. I highly recommend Xen to anyone who has a desire to overcome similar food struggles. Xen, thank you from the bottom of my heart!”
“I reached out to Xenia because 2021 started on a tumultuous note for me. Between deaths, businesses suffering, hospitalizations, and job losses in our personal circle, I felt depleted and found myself being available for everyone but myself. Then I was hit with an unexpected health diagnosis, which was the last straw as it meant giving up “healthy foods” and workouts that I leaned on for my well-being and stability. Despite working in wellness (Yes, coaches and healers are vulnerable too!), I found myself reaching out to desserts for comfort. I like to live a life of permissions (not labels or deprivation leading to bingeing), so I wanted to work with someone who approached healing from a place of mindful compassion. I didn’t want to be my own client. Xenia was great in reminding me to be kind to myself. Working with her, brought me peace and helped shift my mindset. I love how desserts and I look at each other now.”
“Working with Xenia was amazing. She armed me with a bunch of tools to help me through difficult times. Xenia is the kind of person who really cares for helping you in the long run. Her work will forever have an impact in my life.”
“Working with Xen was a game changer for me. After working together for a few months my relationship with food radically changed. I no longer felt like a failure. I now have the tools to nourish my body with foods that feel good in my body. I don’t feel guilty about eating cake or chocolate, I also don’t overeat cake and chocolate. I no longer feel the need to exercise to compensate for my eating. I feel much more free around eating and I am more accepting of my body. Xen has a nonjudgmental and compassionate approach to coaching and really supports you in the process.”
“Working with Xen has been very empowering. Her approach is so refreshing from the usual. I have learned that I am in charge and that I get to choose what I put in my body and how to move my body in a way that I like! I get to make my own choices. It’s so liberating. Once you get a taste of freedom with food, there is no turning back to old ways! Thanks Xen for guiding me along the way to freedom.”
“This is the answer for those of you that struggle with food and all that surrounds it. Xenia said that I could make peace with food and it seemed at the time like an impossible dream. Turns out it isn’t. I recommend Xen and the mindful eating / intuitive eating approach unreservedly. If you have any questions about my experience, please get in touch. Thank you Xen. My rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐”
“Xenia was a walking, living, breathing example of what can be done. I laughed and cried my way through a short course in this fascinating and invigorating programme with her, and have gained a designer tote full of coping skills that go way beyond containing kilogrammes. I feel infinitely lighter. I am doing this for me and, yes, you can do this for you too! And believe me, I’m cynical!”
“I don’t obsess about food like I used to. I am thinking differently about food and feeling so much more relaxed around all types of food. It’s wonderful to have pleasure and satisfaction from eating.”
“I learned a new way of thinking about food. I have learned that food is not the enemy and that it can actually be enjoyed with no guilt.”
