10 Steps To Conquer A Buffet Meal With Joy And Delight

10 Steps To Conquer A Buffet Meal With Joy And Delight

Filed Under: Intuitive Eating

6 September 2019 | Written by Xenia Ayiotis

In my dieting days I had such mixed feelings about buffets. On the one hand they would terrify me – the choice, the desserts, will people judge me if I go back for seconds? And on the other hand I was thrilled by the abundance and choice. I was excited at the anticipation of tasting delicious food!

Before becoming a coach, I worked in tourism and was privileged to travel extensively, staying in beautiful safari lodges and luxurious hotels where the buffets were lavish with a mesmerising display of food.

There were mornings I would stay in my room and have coffee and a protein bar, it was easier to deny myself than to face all that choice. Other times, I would leave the safety of my room only to be feeling bloated, overfull, grumpy and guilty because I had eaten so much. I had no idea about the middle way.

When I discovered Intuitive and Mindful Eating this changed (with a huge amount of practice) and I began to delight in buffet meals.

Here are 10 steps you can take to navigate a buffet meal with joy:

Give yourself permission to eat what you want to eat

The first step is to try not to approach the buffet with dread and fear. See it as an adventure into an array of tastes and options. Definitely don’t tell yourself to “be good” or promise yourself not eat a lot because in most cases your inner rebel will revolt and you will do the opposite. Let go of the idea that you need to use willpower to control yourself. Rather focus on freedom, choice and trust.

Hunger and Fullness

Before eating check in with your hunger levels. How hungry are you? Ask yourself how full would you like to feel after you have finished eating? There is no right or wrong way. If you want to feel full it’s okay – decide how full. If you want to feel light – it’s also okay. You are free to choose.

Explore The Buffet

Survey the scene. What’s on offer? What looks delicious? What calls you? Take it all in. Feast on the visual appeal, the colours and the presentation, the aroma and fragrance.

Go Within

Tune in to your body, your mind and your emotions.

What is your mind saying about the food? Are you judging the food? Labelling the food naughty, bad or good?

Notice how you are feeling? Anxious, excited, worried about that people are watching you or that someone will comment on your food choices?

Become aware of how your body feels and what food might satisfy your mouth, your body, your mind and your taste buds.

As I have said before, kale and cake can co-exist at the same meal!

Choose

Assess the starters, the main course, the cheeses and the desserts. What appeals most to you? If the mains don’t look great why not just have starters and dessert? If the desserts look amazing, enjoy those or if you just feel like crackers and cheese enjoy that! There is no right or wrong way to eat at a buffet.

Try not to be worried about going back a few times.

You could also treat the buffet like a tasting menu – take small amounts of everything like, taste them and go back for what is absolutely delicious.

Eat only what you love

If you take something that doesn’t taste good, give yourself permission not to eat it. Yes, I know it’s wasting. But why waste something that doesn’t taste good in your body?

Slow down and Savour

In social situations there is so much stimulus – remember to slow down, enjoy the taste and texture. Alternate between talking and eating. Pause in -between bites if you remember.

Observe…with no judgement

Notice your levels of fullness and check in, stop when your mind, mouth and body have had enough. Remember our taste buds are in our mouths and the mouth wants entertainment. Fullness is felt in our bellies. The mind may encourage you to have more or may judge you and say you are eating too much. Listen to your body, it has an innate wisdom. Whatever you decide to do – eat more or eat less – try let go of judgement.

End the meal with pleasure

Choose how you would like to end the meal. Is it savoury or sweet? Is it coffee or a liqueur? Enjoy the rounding off of this experience.

Gratitude

You may prefer to do this at the start of the meal. Give thanks for the occasion to be with people and share food. Take a moment to be thankful for the food and the people who prepared it, you could also extend this to the farmers.

Have fun eating and remember this takes practice and patience!

Wishing you peace and freedom with food and buffets!

With love,
Xen

“From our first meeting - two faces on Zoom across the world from each other, there was a sense of familiarity and comfort that was a healing balm for a lifetime of food struggles and dieting. Without realizing how much damage I had done to myself by adhering, for decades, to restrictive food plans and rigid diet programs, Xen had a way of redirecting the harsh and negative self-talk and sending me forth each week with compassion, mindfulness and a new way of seeing myself in the here and now. Gone are the maybe somedays, and if-only, and when-I’m-smaller thinking. Now I am committed to the imperfect and rocky path to listening to my body, accepting my perfect imperfections, and rejecting diet mentality. Those negative voices will revisit me from time to time, I know, but Xen has offered valuable tools for meeting each day as a fresh start - another choice, another chance. Her devotion to this work and her belief in her clients is a remarkable gift; I am so fortunate to have found her. It is never too late to let go of the drama and embrace joy, ease and self-acceptance.”

Karen L, Denver, USA

“I felt hopeless and helpless in my daily struggle with mindless eating for many years. Then I found Xen which is exactly what I needed! My decision to work with her helped me to finally repair my relationship with food. It's changing my life for the better, one day at a time. Now I have control over the food, instead of it having control over me, which is the way it should be. I highly recommend Xen to anyone who has a desire to overcome similar food struggles. Xen, thank you from the bottom of my heart!”

Karen J, Colorado, USA

“I reached out to Xenia because 2021 started on a tumultuous note for me. Between deaths, businesses suffering, hospitalizations, and job losses in our personal circle, I felt depleted and found myself being available for everyone but myself. Then I was hit with an unexpected health diagnosis, which was the last straw as it meant giving up “healthy foods” and workouts that I leaned on for my well-being and stability. Despite working in wellness (Yes, coaches and healers are vulnerable too!), I found myself reaching out to desserts for comfort. I like to live a life of permissions (not labels or deprivation leading to bingeing), so I wanted to work with someone who approached healing from a place of mindful compassion. I didn’t want to be my own client. Xenia was great in reminding me to be kind to myself. Working with her, brought me peace and helped shift my mindset. I love how desserts and I look at each other now.”

Sweta Vikram, New York, USA

“Working with Xenia was amazing. She armed me with a bunch of tools to help me through difficult times. Xenia is the kind of person who really cares for helping you in the long run. Her work will forever have an impact in my life.”

Daniela Velásquez, Ottawa, Canada

“Working with Xen was a game changer for me. After working together for a few months my relationship with food radically changed. I no longer felt like a failure. I now have the tools to nourish my body with foods that feel good in my body. I don’t feel guilty about eating cake or chocolate, I also don’t overeat cake and chocolate. I no longer feel the need to exercise to compensate for my eating. I feel much more free around eating and I am more accepting of my body. Xen has a nonjudgmental and compassionate approach to coaching and really supports you in the process.”

Rachel, Dublin, Ireland

“Working with Xen has been very empowering. Her approach is so refreshing from the usual. I have learned that I am in charge and that I get to choose what I put in my body and how to move my body in a way that I like! I get to make my own choices. It’s so liberating. Once you get a taste of freedom with food, there is no turning back to old ways! Thanks Xen for guiding me along the way to freedom.”

Heather B, Cork. Ireland

“This is the answer for those of you that struggle with food and all that surrounds it. Xenia said that I could make peace with food and it seemed at the time like an impossible dream. Turns out it isn’t. I recommend Xen and the mindful eating / intuitive eating approach unreservedly. If you have any questions about my experience, please get in touch. Thank you Xen. My rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐”

Michelle, Johannesburg, South Africa

“Xenia was a walking, living, breathing example of what can be done. I laughed and cried my way through a short course in this fascinating and invigorating programme with her, and have gained a designer tote full of coping skills that go way beyond containing kilogrammes. I feel infinitely lighter. I am doing this for me and, yes, you can do this for you too! And believe me, I’m cynical!”

Diana, Vancouver, Canada

“I don’t obsess about food like I used to. I am thinking differently about food and feeling so much more relaxed around all types of food. It’s wonderful to have pleasure and satisfaction from eating.”

Sarah, Illinois, USA

“I learned a new way of thinking about food. I have learned that food is not the enemy and that it can actually be enjoyed with no guilt.”

Sandy, London, United Kingdom

Certified by The Life Coach School Certified and Trained by The Original Intuitive Eating Pro Professional Member of The Center for Mindful Eating